LINK TO 2008-2009

Check out the 2008-2009 Online edition of The Mirror.
norwoodmirror.blogspot.com

Mountain Gorillas

Taylor Wellman

The mountain gorilla is the largest of all primates. It lives in the forests of tropical africa. They are becoming extremely endangered. The ones still alive live in four different national parks split into 2 regions that are 28 miles apart. In 2003 340 gorillas live in a national park in Uganda.

Even though these monsters are strong and powering they are a pretty shy animal. They average about 11 gorillas in a group, each led by a dominant male. They have a slow reproduction rate which makes it even worse for their population. In a 50 year life span a female gorilla may only have 2-6 offspring. Newborns are very weak weighing about 4 pounds. They are much like us coming out of the stomach. Weird and awkward.

School comes to a close

The 2008 school year has come to a close but in the last two weeks, there have been three different assemblies recognizing the seniors and underclassmen.

The first of the three assemblies was senior solos. Many seniors participated and sung songs such as: Hero, She Thinks My Tractors Sexy & a piano version of Party Like A Rockstar.

The second assembly was for senior scholarships and tons of seniors won money towards college. Michael Bush won a full ride to UC.

The third assembly was for academic awards for all grades. Many people were honored for there academic excellence.

Congratualations to everyone on the terrific 2007-2008 school year.

My Senior Reflection

As I sat in class on the last day of my senior year, i thought to myself; Where did it all go? It seems to me that it was just yesterday that I was starting school. Now i'm graduating. It is truely amazing. Along the way I have had some great experiences, and have made a lot of great friends that i will hold close to me for the rest of my life. The past 12 years have come down to this single moment in time. As they say, it's now or never. This chapter of my life is now complete, and i am about to embark on an entirely new one.

I have only one wish for the class of 2008. That is for all to do their absolut best in life. Many jokes have been made about our senior class being stupid as well as being apathetic. Well it is time to prove them wrong. Our time is now, it is our time to shine.

With all of this being said, I simply have several things to say. I care about each and every single one of you, weather we were friends or not. I wish everyone the best in life. And that no matter where life takes us, or whatever path we choose to take, we will always be the Norwood Class of 2008.

Songs from Seniors Bring Tears to All

Thursday May 15 some our seniors sang what to their class, kind of like a good-bye song from them.

Alex was the first senior up as he plays 3 songs on the piano. The first one was a song from his church then Party like a Rock Star and lastly Don’t Matter. The seniors were touched on how well he played. Next was Aaron and he sang She thinks my Tractors sexy. And the seniors filled the room with laughter and sadness. Ben sang a song from the band Secondhand Serenade and it was just so smoothing that everyone was so into it. Travis sang this song from the artist Jack Johnson. The audience was quite as he did he best. Mike shocked the whole school when he grabbed the guitar and started singing. No one would expect him to sing how he did.
Afterwards was Marissa as she sang her heart out to Hero. Tears began to fall down out of the seniors’ eyes. It was noticeable that she had touched some people. Gwen was up and sang Impossible. The way she sang brought chills and sadness to people. Last but defiantly the best was Matt Mike and Rob. They sang a song they wrote the night before auditions. It was called Four Years, which talked about the four years of high school. As they reach senior year everyone began to cry. It wasn’t like a tear it was like bawling crying.

All songs that day were memorable, but that song was a great way to end the solos and won’t be forgotten by the class of 2008.

MACHO VOLLEYBALL

This year the macho volleyball game was very interesting. The first game was against the Juniors and the Sophomores. The Sophomores ended up winning and moving on to the final game. The Freshman and the Seniors played in the second game. There was no suprise there when the Seniors won. The Seniors and the Sophomores played in the final game. It was a good game with two good teams. The Seniors came away winning. Congradulations to the Seniors and good job to all of the players and coaches!!

Janish Gets The Call

By: Tyler Sluder

The Cincinnati Reds called up AAA short stop Paul Janish (pronounced Yanish) for Wednesday game against the Florida Marlins, and maybe the rest of the season. The reason for his call up is becasue the current short stop Jeff Keppinger could be out anywhere from 4 weeks to the rest of the season with a broken knee. Keppinger was injured on a foul ball that he hit off of his knee. However in the same atbat he drew a bases loaded walk that gave the Reds a two to zero lead. He played the next two innings in the field but then was taken out.

Janish made his Major League debut in Wednesday nights game in the eigth inning against the Florida Marlins. The Reds were up six to nothing at the time. In his first inning he made two putouts. He got out on his first at bat. In the top of the ninth the Reds gave up six runs and the lead. The game had to go to extra innings. There were no outs with men on first and second base and Janish came up for his second bat of his Major League career. He hit a ball down the line that scored the winning run for the Reds. A perfect way to make an immediate impact and to get your first hit.

On Thursday May 16 the Reds were rained out. On Friday May 17 the start a series with inter league rival the Cleveland Indians.

TTYL

Nikole Picklesimer

TTYL by Lauren Myracle is about three teenagers who are sophomores in high school. Anglea, Maddie, and Zoe are three totally different girls that are somehow best friends. It shows what the life of a teenage girl is all about. The girls deal with many problems including fights and boy drama.

What's most interesting about the novel is that it is written in all instant messges. With a new style of writing and a storyline all teenage girls would love, TTYL is a great read for just about anyone. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone who enjoys books about friendship.

TTYL is only the first out of three books! The sequels to TTYL are TTFN and L8r, g8r. These two books also explore the world of Angela, Maddie, and Zoe while they go through high school and encounter more difficuties along the way.

To high?

Rising gas prices are affecting more than the family budget. More pain at the pump results in more employee stress on the job.
The information by surveying more than 800 full-time employees this spring when gas prices hovered at about $3.50 per gallon. All of the people surveyed work in a wide range of occupations, primarily in the southeastern United States. All drove personal transportation to work and had an average commute of 15 miles each way. Survey respondents said gas prices were foremost on their mind, including a disgruntled factory worker who wrote. Since gas prices has rised some effects come on into play.
- 52% of people have reconsidered taking a family vaction
- 45% had to cut back on card payments
- 30% of people had gone without the basics such as clothes, food, medicine, ect.
- 45% have gone behind on payments
- 33% say they would quit there job for one close to their homes.

Many employees report that gas prices rank as the No. 1 water-cooler discussion topic, ahead of family, sports or work, he said. He found little difference in responses among different ages, gender, work tenure and occupations.
As gas prices rise, so does the stress.

Top of the charts

This week on the billboard charts the top ten albums are:

• Hard candy by Madonna
• E=MC2 by Mariah Carey
• Spirit by Leona Lewis
• Lyfe Change byLyfe Jennings
• Songs from the Sparkle Lounge by Def Leppard
• The Roots by Rising Down
• Portishead by by Third
• Mudcrutch by Mudcrutch
• Now 27
• Greatest Hits by Tim McGraw

The number one song in America is bleeding Love by Leona Lewis. Bleeding love was originally written by Jessie McCartney.

You're Gonna Miss This...

--Cheyenne Hamberg

Well gang, we're at that point. That point where all the norm melts away into the bright and terrifying unknown. The point where the baby birds are tossed out of the nest to fly or plummet to their demise. Let's hope most of us can make the jump.

So as I sit here, the realization that this very well will be one of my last web posts for The Mirror, I begin to wonder what other seniors will miss.

I know for me it's the relationships I've made;

Those friends I've made who put up with my dorkiness and indulge sometimes themselves. Who've never failed to be at my back when I've faltered to offer a helping hand and a smile, never once judged me for not being as smart or pretty as others but have accepted me just as quirky as I am.

The teachers who've been so kind to me and become my mentors and friends, who've each given me something wonderful to take away from their lessons. You really get to know the teachers at Norwood, they watch you grow up and they know you. They've always treated me as an adult, as a being of equal intellect, worthy of their time and attention and for that I couldn't be more grateful.

I'll miss all those relationships I've made in the plays where for about two months we become something of a family, all hugs and laughter one moment then cutthroat fights the next. It was something special to be backstage with someone you know you'll never see outside the auditorium and cry with as you finally write your name on the wall, having waited and suffered through countless musicals and plays with this person just to get to that point, all to scribble your name in white out then leave the warmth of the stagelights and the chill of the concrete steps forever. I'll miss late night practices and Saturday morning rehearsals. I'll miss whinning about the cast and the play in general and secretly loving every minute of it. I'll miss those few moments when an entire sea of people are watching you, fixed on your every word and cheering you with applause, not because they were forced to come, but because they wanted to be there, they wanted to see you rise up to a challenge and soar above expectation.

I'll even miss all those quiet relationships I've made, the ones nobody's supposed to know about or talk about out loud. The ones with the Time Gods who enjoy making that clock tick just a half a second slower or running it too fast when you're racing to finish something important. My locker, the fiend, as I battled it daily for my books and failed miserably for the first couple years. That voice in my head that soothes when I've failed or inflates my ego when I've excelled. I'll miss the odd acts of kindness in the hallway, the person that smiles and says "excuse me" when they bump into you or the kid that takes the time to just nod a hello when they make eye contact.

I wonder what others will miss about Norwood, what they won't say outloud because it's uncool or so small they think no one will care. I wonder if many of these people even realize what they have and how much they're going to miss it when they leave.

I know I will and every time I walk through the halls of NKU, feeling small and uncertain if I can find my way on the big scary road of life, I'll think of all you and the special things we shared and I'll feel that I'll always have people at my back to help me.

And I thank all of you for that.

Percy Jackson and the Olympians

The Battle of the Labyrinth

Kendall Jent

Greek history is back with a new twist. The award winning series Percy Jackson and the Olympians by Rick Riordan will continue on May sixth with Battle of the Labyrinth. From what I can gather Percy Jackson the main character and his close half-blood friends must save their camp from ultimate destruction. To accomplish this they set out on a journey through the Labyrinth to "find something that has been lost for centuries." On a side note the Labyrinth is said to have belonged to Pan (the long lost god) which helps explain the title. The reason for going to the Labyrinth is to stop the main traitor Luke from breaching the borders of Camp Half-Blood.

Also I've gathered that the war between the Olympians and the evil titan Kronos won't happen but that just means the series will continue.

Mauk Still May Still Have A Chance

By: Tyler Sluder

University of Cincinnati quarterback Ben Mauk may still have a chance at playing for the Bearcats this coming season. After being denied a sixth year of eligibility two times, Mauk now will have a chance to talk to the commitee face to face and tell them his story.

Mauk's case is this. His freshmen year at Wake Forest he was redshirted. He played his sophomore year, and at the start of his junior year in the first quarter of the first game he broke his arm and required season ending sergury. He then transferred to Cincinnati were he played a third full year of football. Mauk thinks that he should have a final year of football becasue he has only played three full years of college football. The reason he was not granted eligiblility the first time he appealed the commitee is because they believe he sat out his freshmen season because he thought he was not going to play. Mauk says he sat out because of an injury. His second appeal was denied because Wake Forest did not provide enough information on Mauk and his health.

Mauk is believed to have one more shot at eligibility. He will talk face to face to the commitee sometime within the next month. If he is denied eligibility he wants to become an assistant with the Bearcats or help his dad coach his old highschool team.

The top runners for the starting quarterback job if Mauk does not come back are Senior Dustin Grutza and sophomore Demetrius Jones who is a transfer from Notre Dame.

PROM 2008!!

Tonight is the big night that the senior class has been waiting for,PROM!! This year prom will take place at The Great American Ballpark. The theme this year is Blacktie Affair. This year the Seniors got out of school at 11:15 to prepare for the big night. It is going to be a big night for all of the prom king and queen nominess. We hope for the best! Hope the See you there!!

Spirit Week

The week of 4-28 through 5-2 Norwood had their spirit week. Monday was PJ day. Students wore their slippers to their baths ropes.

Tuesday was hat day. From big colorful hats to small baseball caps Norwood rocked it out.

Wednesday was favorite team day. Students wore the jersey of the Bengals to the reds. Also Bearcats to golf/skating shirts.

Thursday was twin day. Each student had a twin that day. They wore the same hairstyles to the same shoes. It was one senior to one sophomore. They didn’t have to be in the same class but they looked so much alike.

Friday as always was class colors. Freshman wore white, sophomores wore red, juniors wore bed and the big seniors showed off all the colors. Red, blue and white.

All of this to count down the day till prom. Which was Friday May 2nd.

Johnson makes his opinion clear

It is clear to everyone now that Bengals wide receiver Chad Johnson does not want to have any part of the Cincinnati organization. In an interview with NFL Network’s Solomon Wilcots, Johnson was quoted saying, “I will take the criticism, I will stick by my guns, and I will not be there. I feel things need to be done to make this team better. I don't blame Marvin Lewis. I love him. You have never heard me say one bad thing about my coaches or teammates. I know it's not up to Coach Lewis. Whether I'm traded, or if we get better players, is not up to him. If it was up to Coach Lewis, then he would do it."

The current contract of Johnson is with the Bengals until the year 2011. The contract denies Johnson the right to go to any other team or sign any other contracts. The Bengals scheduled opening game is September 7th 2008 at Baltimore.

Inkheart

Kendall Jent

A novel beyond comparison. Inkheart by Cornelia Funke is the book to read after Harry Potter. Filled with inspiring characters, awesome scenery, and a plot worthy of the Nobel, Inkheart is a true classic.

The book starts off with Meggie, a teenage girl who abousetly adores reading. Raised by her father Mortimer (Mo) Meggie has grown up with only the books around her-that is until Mo recieves a surprise visit by an old friend. Dustfinger is a man marked with knife wounds who claims to be from Inkheart, a storybook in Mo's collection. After the visit where Mo denies something for Dustfinger both Meggie and Mo's lifes are thrust into peril.

The book takes you on a whirlwind adventure filled with secrets, depair, and a unique collection of books. I would seriously recommend reading Inkheart,because it's a fantasy that will never be forgotten, especially considering it's movie counterpart will appear in theaters January 2009.

I Am Legend

Nikole Picklesimer

I Am Legend is about a plague that kills almost all of humanity, leaving barely anyone alive. There are those who are immune, and those who have the deadly plague and morph into something completley different. Robert Neville is a scientist who lived through the devastating plague.

In his basement, Robert Neville works on his plan to find a cure. After coming close many times, it seems as if there is no hope for Neville. When he is saved by a woman and her son, she tries to prove to him that a more powerful source is what will save them. Will it? Watch and find out.

Actors in this movie include: Will Smith, Alice Braga, Charlie Tahan, Salli Richardon and Willow Smith.

Geekisms- Because Geek Is Chic

Geek Dancing

It's prom time.

The air's buzzing with talk of who's going with who, limo companies are washing their cars, restruants are overbooking, boys are working up the guts to ask for dates, and girls are all a twitter about what they'll be wearing.

Let's face it, any big schindig like this is just screaming for geekdom. I mean, if someone really wanted to throw a good party, they'd go vintage but not everybody outside the history buff ring would go for that so we must press on. Lots of highschoolers tend to take these things way too seriously (I heard one girl the other day near tears because a girl in her limo group was going to wear the same color dress she was and how DARE she try to ruin prom night for her! lol) but we, the geeks, typically don't care and are genuinlly there for the fun of it. We're the ones who if we do get a limo, we stick out heads out the windows and hoot and hollar, not caring about our hair one bit, or if we don't have a limo, we pile into a friend's car or make our parents drive us. We do the cabbage patch when everyone else is grinding eachother and do the Electric Slide while everyone else does that crappy Solja Boy thing or however you spell it. We drink our Pepsi through crazy straws and steal flowers from the tables.

However, when it comes to dress attire, we're styling in our own way.

Guys, you get bonus points if you dress like Doctor Who. That means a striped suit and Chucks. It's a classic look and the geek ladies love it, trust me. I don't get the whole thing about guys slicking their hair down to their skulls, geek guys look infinately better with a messy pompadour do or something of the like. Bonus points if you somehow manage to sneak a tuxedo T-shirt past the front door (though I doubt it'd escape your girlfriends).

Gals, the good news with us is that pretty much anything goes. Flapper dresses are making a comeback in the fashion world and many shorter dresses are borrowing the Tinkerbell style to create a cuter, more bubbly look. And if you really want to go retro, there's always princess dresses or Victorian gowns. Seriously, if I see someone at prom this year wearing an actual "gown", I will hug you. For reals.

Have an epic prom my geeklings!

Harry Potter Seven Turns to Eight

By S. Hof

Producers announced that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the final installment of the Harry Potter epic, will actually be split into two seperate movies. It was decided that there was simply too many vital scenes in the final book that could not be left out when it was converted into a film, and for the sake of time, will be made in to two different parts.

"I think it's the only way you can do it, without cutting out a huge portion of the book," Radcliffe said. "There have been compartmentalized subplots in the other books that have made them easier to cut -- although those cuts were still to the horror of some fans -- but the seventh book doesn't really have any subplots. It's one driving, pounding story from the word go." (Source: http://www.latimes.com/entertainment/news/la-et-potter13mar13,1,5626063.story)

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part I is scheduled to be released November of 2010, and Part II in May of 2011.

Songs and Sweets!!

The Norwood High School Silhouettes and the Girls Choral will be performing this Saturday night at 7:00. They will be doing a number of songs both together and seperately. They will be doing some songs from Harispray and some other ones. There will also be a collection of solos being performed. Come support your peers in the Middle School auditorium. It is five dollars admission!!

Are teenage girls becoming to violent?

Recently on March 30, 2008 eight teenagers lured another teenage girl by the name of Victoria Lindsy to a home in Tampa Florida and continued to violently beat her over and over while to men stood outside to be look outs. The girls filmed the whole beating and uploaded it on to youtube the popular video posting website hoping to become "famous" when it really cost them jail time. They basically gave the police all the evidence they needed to convict every single one of them. Victoria sufferes from a concussion, damsge to her left eye and left ear, as well as several bruises. After enduring the 35 minute beating they forced her into car and dropped her off at another location warning her if she made contact to the police the next beating would be worse. All eight involved were arrested and charged with felony battery and false inprisonment.

Nim's Island

I first thought this movie was strange because Nim's mother gets swallowed by a whale and is taken away. But as the movie went on, I thought it was vey interesting.

It's about this girl named Nim (Abigail Breslin) who lives on a secret island with her father. When her father is traped in the middle of the sea she has to do everything she can to protect her island and in the end she meets her favorite novlevist, Alex Rover (Jodie Foster).

I would recommend this movie to people who love adventure and mystery because you don't know what will happen to her father and she has to go to extremes to save her sland; even go into a volcano!

Indians cruise to first win of the season

By: Tyler Sluder

Last night, April 7, 2008, the Norwood Indians baseball team defeated the Mt. Healthy Owls in a final score of 12 to 2. The Indians were led by senior pitcher Adam Clark, who only gave up to runs in the six innings he pitched. Clark also had 14 strikeouts.

The Indians also hit the ball very well last night. Brett Brinkmeyer lead off the game with a double down the third base line. Two batters later, Adam Clark hit a double that scored Brinkmeyer. The inning continued after Clark stole third base and Jeff Tyree walked and stole second base. Following the walk Tyler Sluder had a base hit that scored Clark and Tyree.

The hitting did not end after the first inning. Clark added another hit and Chett Williams had two hits and a sacrifice bunt. Tyler Sickinger ended the game with a single to right field that brought home two Indians and clinched the win and put the ten run mercy run intact.

All Hail The Dork

S. Hof

Called this generation's The Catcher in the Rye, King Dork by Frank Portman is one of the most popular young adult novels today. In fact, it's so popular that comedian and actor Will Ferral has purchased the rights to the novel from Dr. Frank (from the Mr. T Experience) and plans to convert the book into a movie. Details have yet to be released, but the fil;m is expected to be released this year.

King Dork (also known as Chi-Mo, Sheepie, and of course, Tom Henderson) is a social misfit trying to make sense of several mysteries, not the least of which being that surrounding his father's death some years before. The entire story is sent rolling when Tom discovers his father's copy of the Salinger classic, The Catcher in the Rye, along with several other novels containing what, at first glance, appears nothing more than jibberish, but may in fact hold the key to his puzzle of a life.

The novel is an easy one to read, and is entertaining while interesting. Tom Henderson represents the vast majority of the student population of any high school one might come by, which is perhaps the secret to King Dork's instant success. If you happen to come by a copy, I recommend you sit down and read it.

Reds Conclude Series with Phillies

The Philadelphia Phillies turn to ace Cole Hamels in hopes of ending a two-game losing streak to the Reds as the two teams play the last of four straight meetings this afternoon at Great American Ball Park.
After posting an 8-4 victory over the Reds on Friday, the Phillies dropped the next two tests of this series, including yesterday's 8-2 setback. Jeff Keppinger went 3-for-5 with a home run, three RBI and three runs scored to lead an impressive offensive performance by Reds.
Ken Griffey Jr. gave the Reds an early lead with a two-run homer off Phillies starter Brett Myers in the first inning, the future Hall of Famer's first of the season and 594th of his career. Brandon Phillips added three hits to back an outstanding National League debut for Cincinnati pitcher Edinson Volquez.
Volquez, acquired from the Texas Rangers in a trade for troubled outfielder Josh Hamilton over the winter, allowed just one run and struck out a career- high eight batters over 5 1/3 innings in his first start of 2008.
Myers struggled on the hill for the Phillies, as the right-hander gave up both Griffey and Keppingers' homers and surrendered four runs on eight hits while lasting only five innings.

The Chronicles of Narnia-Prince Caspian

Movie Preview

Kendall Jent

If you are a book-to-movie lover then this movie is going to be your Friday night ticket. This movie is highly anticipated with the previews drawing in millions of people. The cast from the first Narnia movie are set to star in the sequel so our favorite characters are back inculding Peter (William Moseley), Susan (Anna Popplewell), Lucy (Georgie Henley), Edmund (Skandar Keynes). Prince Caspian is played by Ben Barnes.

The movie is full of action, adventure, and suspense. In the book it is one year later for the Pensieve children but when they are pulled back to Narnia, they fine a thousand years have passed there. Then the children get caught in a battle between Old and New Narnia. At the end there is a major twist that will change the series forever.

The movie is coming out on June 5, 2008 and the highly anticpated flick is expected to break Harry Potter records.

The Rules of Survival

Book Review

By Nikole Picklesimer

The Rules of Survival, by Nancy Werlin is about three kids with a mentally and physically abusive mother. Matt, Callie, and Emmy are all children of Nikki, a very unstable, dangerous woman. She treats her kids like gold one minute, and then horribly the next. Matt and Callie lost all hope for them and their younger sister Emmy. That is, until they met Murdoch.

Murdoch is a very loving, caring man whom Matt and Callie watch save a little boy from his father. Soon after, a so called "miracle" happens. Their abusive mother starts to date Murdoch. Everything seems fine until Murdoch and Nikki's relationship comes to an end. Nikki seems to get worse with her temper once they break up, doing things that are anything but motherly. From then on, Matt and Callie try to somehow make things right and get Murdoch back in their life without their mother going crazy.

The Rules Of Survival is an interesting book that anyone would enjoy reading. Werlin makes the feelings of Matt and Callie seem so real, that teens can easily connect to how they feel. The Rules Of Survival is definitely an eye-opening book because it shows what can really happen in an abusive family.

Gas prices on the rise

By Sam Durbin

Gas prices these days are getting higher by the week, especially during holidays and weekends, and it really effects teens the most.
Teens that are in school and are involved in sports probably don’t work a lot don’t have the money to keep refilling their tanks. Gas these days ranges from $3.30 to $4 a gallon. A year ago gas prices was only $2.57. That is pretty much a dollar more. So if each year prices go up a couple of dollars then by 2011 gas should be close to $10.00 per gallon.
There’s a lot of confusion on why gas prices are high, but the main reason why is because the price of oil is high. (Although, conspiracy theorists continue to raise their collective eyebrows at the record earnings of gas companies.) Oil prices are high because world demand is up and world supply is not. So unless a new oil reserve is discovered, drivers are stuck with gas prices going up.
In the meantime, here are some ways to save money we on gas:
-car pool
-ride the bus
-take turns driving with friends
-walk to local places
-ride a bike
-fill up on Tuesdays (generally the cheapest gas day)
-avoid filling up on holiday weekends, if you can help it
-ask friends who mooch rides to chip in a few bucks

Cyber Bullying

The World Wide Web can be a very dangerous place. Cyber Bullying has been spreading around like wild fire. It has become very common among teens whether it is through Myspace, AIM, or text message.

According to research at Cyberbullying.us, over 33 percent of youth experienced online bullying at some point. Seventeen percent of that youth admitted to bullying another individual online.

Cyber Bullying is a very serious issue and it’s spreading throughout high schools all over America. There have even been cases of suicide attempts because of bullying. Megan Meier committed suicide as a result of a myspace hoax. An ex friend and her mother created a fake account and befriended Meier. Once they grew close, the "friend" on the fake account grew distant and spread rumors about Meier. Meier's parents discovered her dead in her room.

The majority of the student body at Norwood High School have Myspace accounts and few of their parents monitor whats going on. With a high number of incidents of online bullying it's important that parents stay aware and involved with their childrens online activites

Students should also be careful of what they post online. It's important to think about the things you say to someone online or over text message because you don’t know what kind of long term affects it will have on their life.

Spring Break Just Around the Corner

By Ashleigh Stromski

In the United States, spring break may range from the end of February to later days in April, but many schools are out for at least one of the weeks in March. Some schools call this "March break" when it is a middle week in March. Many K-12 institutions in the United States coincide their spring break with Easter and Passover

Spring break is pretty much a break in March where kids get out of school. At Norwood High school we did a survey of what people look forward to the most during spring break an a high percentage said not going to school or sleeping in.

Many kids told us during spring break they like to travel and visit family. A lot of kids' families live in Florida so they said its always fun to go to Florida to see them. If they are visiting family they are sleeping in or hanging out with friends.

Need Some Advice?

We are starting a new advice column for those in need of help. If you're looking for advice in one of the areas below, please feel free to ask for it.

-relationships with boyfriend/girlfriend

-relationship with your parents

-friend drama

-school

Lebron to Lead Cavs to Another Title Shot?

By Ryan Cook

Lebron James, 23 years old, dropped 50 points and 10 assists in the game against the Ney York Knicks last night. The Cavs won 119- 105 with Lebron shooting 16 of 30 from the field including 7 of 13 from the three point range. This is Lebron's second 50 point game of the season, and he exited the arena with the fans standing and shouting "MVP!"

Lebron became the first player with at least 50 points, 10 assists and eight rebounds in a game since Kareem Abdul-Jabbar on Jan. 19, 1975. His 50-10 night put him in a group with two other players who, in the last 20 years, have recorded a 50-10 night. The other two players are Stephon Marbury who did it against the Lakers in 2001, Marbury finished with 52 points and 12 assists. The other is all-time legend Michael Jordan who did it in 1992 against the Bullets, he finished with 57 points and 10 assists.

David Pollack Nears Decision

By John Daniel

According to broadcast reports, David Pollack has met with his specialist in Los Angeles and has been cleared to play. But that doesn't mean he's going to. After returning from California, those close to Pollack say he's going to spend some time fasting and praying before he announces his decision at a Paul Brown Stadium news conference. The Bengals apparently staying in a 4-3 defense doesn't appear to be part of the process, although it does fit with Pollack's desire. Pollack, the Bengals No. 1 pick in 2005 as a defensive end, has told the club he would prefer to return as an end instead of a linebacker if he keeps playing to avoid the collisions like the one with Browns running back Reuben Droughns that broke his neck Sept. 17, 2006.

Random Person of the Week

Name: Janie Danielle Vogelsong

Favorites:

Food- watermelon

Restaurant- Beni-Hanas

Kind of food (Chinese, Mexican ect.) Japanese

Class you have- Gym

Subject- History

Movie- Forest Gump

Actor- Vince Vaughn

Actress- Jennifer Aniston

Store- Micheal's

What's your most embarrassing moment?

When I tripped and fell in the cafeteria.

If you had to choose any where to live in the whole world where would it be?

L.A California

You had to go to an island what would you take with you 5 things/people?

Sadoku, Cell phone, Sara Martin, my computer, and a rubix cube.

The best thing that has happened to you?

My friends!

Do you remember any childhood memories?

Yes, all of them I miss them a lot.

How many kids do you want?

Two; one boy and one girl

What would you name them?

Vieda Chantel

James Odel

What kind of car do you want?

Impalla MARKED OUT HA!

Where you want to live when you get older?

Tabasco, Mexico

By Larissa Craddock

I Am The Messenger

By S. Hof

In the mood for a good story? Try I Am The Messenger by Markus Kusak. Humor, romance, suspense, action, a coffee-drinking canine: this story has it all.

Meet Ed Kennedy, an underage cab driver whose ordinary life becomes a lot more complicated when he happens to stop a robbery. That's when he recieves the first card in the mail. For some reason or another, Ed has been chosen to travel around his city helping, and hurting when necessary, designated people.

I truly enjoyed this book. It's probably one of my favorite stories now. I couldn't get through a page without smiling at the very least, sometimes downright laughing out loud and earning myself strange looks from people around me. Probably my favorite thing about the book was the different people Ed meets. Some of them, an old woman named Milla for example, just warm your heart while others left you disgusted. But all of them cause you to look at strangers in a whole new way. They have lives, problems, memories, and sadness just like you and me, and sometimes it only takes a warm smile from a stranger to help them through another day.

Geekisms- Because Geek Is Chic

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To the rest of you: go educate yourselves on what the heck the rest of the world’s saying!

Translate this article and everything else with this link or annoy your friends! http://www.brenz.net/l337Maker.asp

Farve Decides To Call It Quits

After 17 seasons, all of which were played with the Green Bay Packers, Brett Farve decided Tuesday to end his career. For the last three years, Farve flirted with retiring but could never pull the string. Now he is done for good. He is going to call it a career, and some career it was.

Farve is a super bowl champion, having been a part of the team when they won Super Bowl XXXI. He also is the record holder for most touch down passes with 442, as well as passing yards with 61,655 and wins as a starter with 160.

In his career Farve has completed 5,377 of his 8,758 passes. He has won three MVP awards. The Falcons selected him 31^st overall in the 1991 draft, but then traded him to the Packers. Farve started his career against the Cincinnati Bengals, a game which he won. His final game was in the NFC Championship game, a loss against the New York Giants.

Eragon: Just another LOTR Wannabe or Welcome Addition to the Genre?

The Inheritance Cycle

K. S. Jent

Eragon is one of the best books I' ve read in my fifteen years of life. The characters are awesome, the action is incredible, and the plot is spine tingling. It starts off showing how a fifteen year farmboy named Eragon finds an amazingly polished stone. The stone which is actually an egg, which hatches not too long afterwards, and out popped a dragon. Eragon, fearful of having to get rid of it, raises the dragon in secret. Just when Saphira (the dragon) learns to fly, fearful creatures called the Ra 'zac, summoned by the king, come to the town. Saphira, frightened of these ghastly creatures kidnaps Eragon and takes him to a remote location. After much begging and pleading, Eragon convinces Saphira to go back only to find that his house is burned and his Uncle is dead. With rage in his eyes Eragon sets off on a quest to find the Ra 'zac accompined by a knowledgable storyteller named Brom. In the middle Eragon travels throught Alagesia finally landing in the secret base of a rebel group called the Varden. There a vicious battle occurs between the Varden and the King's Forces. Eragon is horribly wounded and while lying in a state of unconscieness, a mysterious voice announces himself and tells Eragon to visit him in the elves' kingdom.

. Eldest is also a excellent book. Paolini describes a lot more in this one and we get to know more characters. Eldest is a little better than Eragon because Eldest has one of the best war scences ever created. Eldest sets off with Eragon walking through the bloodied battlefield and a suprise attack kills one of the Varden's leader and takes Eragon's friend Murtagh, who he met while traveling through Alagesia, prisoner. Eragon then goes to Ellesmera, the elves' kingdom and trains with the last remaining dragon rider Vrail. Eragon, during one of the elves holiday undegoes a massive transformation blending human and elf. The rest of the book is him preparing for a battle that has a surprise ending.

These are the first two books and I defiantly recommend reading them.

New Jordans Look to the Future and the Past

Jordan retro 23

The Jordan retro 23 are being released tomorrow February 16. It is the first jordan to be manufactured under the Nike Considered Company.They are trying to make these shoes as environmentally friendly as possible. They are using less glue and adhesive to put the shoe together. This is why the shoe is almost completely stitched together. Certain parts of the shoe are also made out of recycled and environmentally preferred materials to reduce environmental waste.

This is the 23rd retro made by Jordan. Even though he is retired he is still one of the highest selling shoe brands in the world. Jordan sponsors other athletes like Carmelo Anthony, Richard Hamilton, and many more. He also sponsors a couple colleges. A couple being his own North Carolina, Georgetown, and a couple others.

On They’re Way to State!!

By: Natalie Ayers

Update: We just got a call that Tyler Alsip won his third match and is going on to wrestle tommorrow. Unfortunatly, Robert James lost his match and is now out of the tournament, but finished with an amazing senior season for Norwood.

This year Norwood has two boys going to state for wrestling. Junior Tyler Alsip and Senior Robert James. This Thursday and Friday they will be in Columbus wrestling for the championship. Tyler has said that he is really excited to be going to state. “I worked really hard to get here and the kid that I beat to go to state, I have beat six times this year!” Said Alsip.

To get himself prepared for state he is keeping mentally calm and is trying to get in as much practice as he can. He has said that when he found out that he was going to state he was really excited because that meant that he had worked hard enough to be there. Mr. Robisch has said that they have been practicing at Moeller for the last couple days to prepare themselves. They are training with kids in other divisions that qualified for state.

What do stars have planned for your future?

Aries- March 21- April 19

You will be having some attitude problems this month, but you are going to become very passionate about someone that you can't have. You go well with Libra.

Your lucky number is 4. Your lucky color is blue.

Taurus- April 20- May 20

Your friends are in need of a loyal friend. You may need to step in and help them out. You go well with Virgo.

Your lucky number is 7. Your lucky color is yellow.

Gemini- May 21- June 21

You will be meeting someone that is just like you in everyway. This could be a good thing or a bad thing. You go well with Aquarius.

Your lucky number is 12. Your lucky color is purple.

Cancer- June 22- July 22

You have a deep inner world that you are going to start sharing with that someone special in your life. You go well with Taurus.

Your lucky number is 6. Your lucky color is orange.

Leo- July 23- August 23

You like to be loved the same way that you love other people. You want someone in your life to do that. Maybe try an Aries.

You lucky number is 2. Your lucky color is green.

Virgo- August 24- September 23

You need a partner with a very strong agenda and who wants to go far in life. You are also irritated with lazy people. You go well with Taurus, Capricorn, Cancer and Scorpio.

Your lucky number is 11. Your lucky color is pink.

Libra- September 24- October 23

You don’t hate being alone and you prefer being with a large group of friends. You also need to learn how to control your temper. You go well with Leo.

Your lucky number is 14. Your lucky color is red.

Scorpio- October 24- November 22

You are very physical and you know how to show affection toward others. You go well with Cancer.

Your lucky number is 8. Your lucky color is turquoise.

Sagittarius- November 23- December 20

You are the bachelor sign but you are not very lucky right now. You make good friends with Libra.

Your lucky number is 16. Your lucky color is white.

Capricorn- December 21- January 20

You find no problems in purely physical relationships. You are very passionate and have a kind heart. You go well with Virgo, and Scorpio.

Your lucky umber is 9. Your lucky color is black.

Aquarius- January 22- February 19

You have a strong sign of friendship. You always remain friends with your exes and that can be a very good thing. You are not a jealous person either. You go well with Aries, and Gemini.

Your lucky number is 20. Your lucky color is peach.

Pisces- February 20- March 20

You have a deep heart when it comes to relationships. You always try your best to be supportive of your friends and family. But be careful not to be too kind. You are always comfortable with Cancer and Scorpia.

Your lucky number is 5. Your lucky color is mauve.

Meet The Spartans

Stephanie Prather

My first impression of the movie was that it was funny and humorous. It makes fun of so many movies and television shows like 300, Spiderman 3, Shrek the Third, American Idol, Deal or No Deal, Dancing With the Stars, Transformers, and Stomp the Yard . Some of the people it makes fun of are Brittany Spears, Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, Sanjaya from American Idol and his crying fan, Elen Degenris, George Bush and more.

The spartans are on a journey to defeat the Persians. But when they reach their destination they encounter many challenges such as break dancing, a "yo mama" joke showdown, and the robot.

Meet the Saprtans is a movie that is aimed at making people laugh. Throughout the movie actors and actresses are made fun of but it is a big hit with the crowd. Some of the actors are Sean Maguire, Carmen Electra, Ken Davitian, Kevin Sorbo, Diedrich Bader, Method Bader. The main view of this movie is comedy.

www.images.google.com

The Invasion

My first impression of The Invasion was suprise. I thought that the way they combined science fiction and horror made the movie eye-catching and wonderful to watch. Plus, the movie is based off the book The Body Snatchers, by Jack Finney. The Invasion is about an alien virus attacking modern day Earth. The virus attacks your DNA while you sleep and morphs you into a souless creature. Once you're infected, you can't fall asleep or it will enter your body and change your DNA coding and change you into a totally different person.

The main character, Carol Bennell, is a psychiatrist and drops off her son Oliver off at his father's house. Not knowing that her ex-husband has the virus that starts it all, Carol leaves Oliver in the hands of his father.

Once Carol realizes that something is wrong, she goes back to her ex-husband's house to pick up Oliver, but he isn't there. From then on, Carol is on a race to find Oliver and to not fall asleep along the way.

Some of the actors in this film include, Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, Jackson Bond, Jeremy Northam, and Jeffery Wright.

Roger Clemens Under Fire

On Wednesday February 13th, Roger Clemens testified under oath to a committee about his alleged steroid use. His former personal trainer Brian Mcnamee claims that he injected 7 Time CY Young award winner Roger Clemens with human growth hormones on several occasions.
After a 4 ½ hour session with the committee, Clemens denied any use of HGH or PEDs during his baseball career. Clemens, meanwhile, revealed himself as incapable of introspection or culpability. When cornered, he attempted to bully, but the 2154 room of the Rayburn House Office Building is not a pitcher's mound. Not having the situation under his control frustrated Clemens, and he did not know what to do.

Chick Flicks: Bury Them or Love Them?

By S. Hof and Kendall Jent

For our first He Says/She Says article, Kendall and I decided to compile it into an actual debate rather than two separate articles as we had originally planned. And as our first topic, we chose none other than…Chick flicks. As can be expected, I rather like chick flicks while Kendall…Not so much.

He: Chick flicks are filled with romance and lack action, adventure, and comedy. Why would you want to rent that?

She: Actually, many chick flicks double as comedies, and while they can miss out on action and the like, romance is plenty adventure. Romance also deals with betrayal and other darker themes.

He: Do you mean middle-aged divorcees staring at men? Because that’s not what romance and action are about.

She: Actually, by adventure I meant overcoming impossible obstacles in order to find true happiness, but yours is okay too, I guess.

He: What do you mean by, ‘impossible obstacles’? Women asking a guy out on a date? That’s not too hard and makes for a dry story.

She: I agree, that would make for a dry story…If that was really what chick flicks are about. Generally, the movies are about two people who, under circumstances that differ from film to film, find it difficult to be together and about not about a girl asking out a guy.

He: There’s nothing difficult about getting together. You just go over and ask them if they would like to go out. Chick flicks center around nothing.

She: So you’re saying that there are no circumstances in which two people could find it difficult to be with each other? What about Romeo & Juliet? The story is old, but it’s a common theme. Two lovers divided by the hate of their families might have trouble going out on Saturday nights.

He: Romeo & Juliet is a good example. As I recall, Romeo and Juliet did see each other, and it was based on his unimaginable actions that he was forced to go away.

She: Exactly! That sort of twist is what makes a good story. Chick flicks are about overcoming obstacles. It’s not always centered around romance, but can deal with family, past friendships, or death of a loved one. Sometimes, as in the case of young Juliet and her Romeo, the obstacles aren’t always easily overcome and there is no happy ending. The point is that the stories themselves can be thrilling and help the audience feel emotionally involved and connected with both the characters and their problems, making them fun to watch.

He: Obstacles about overcoming a difficult thing. Movies centered around past friendships are stupid because if they were really friends, they’d remember each other. Plus action movies have deaths of loved ones so by centering a chick flick around it means that the writers of that story cannot come up with anything better to say. Honestly who would want to watch a movie that completely centers around someone overcoming a death or friendship? They do not follow traditional stories because they lack vital ingredients like a climax.

She: Can you honestly say that after you’ve grown and either you move away or your friends do, you’ll keep in touch with every single one of them? Things happen. And while action movies do have deaths, those deaths do not drive the story, as in the case of movies like Elizabethtown in which the common theme is the death of the main character’s father. Chick flicks do contain climaxes. Tuck Everlasting. Should she become immortal and wait for Tuck to return, or live her life? It’s a suspenseful moment. It may not have things blowing up, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be enjoyable.

He: Anyway, chick flicks are sappy, boring, and filled with cheap characters who have no real problems, only the ones they create in their heads.

She: Chick flicks are good stories to watch. They help people get in touch with their emotions and feel empathy for others. And speaking on a personal note, I always feel good about myself when I finish a chick flick; like I’ve overcome something, too. It’s important to have these touching stories in our lives because it’s not always just another screenplay from Hollywood; these things really happen, and by watching them, really watching them, we grow a little bit as people.

Topping the Billboard Charts...

This week on the Billboard charts the number one hit song is Low by Flo Rida featuring T-Pain and it’s also featured in the new upcoming movie Step Up 2 coming out this Valentine's Day. The top ten songs on the charts this week are:

1. Low by Flo Rida Featuring T-Pain
2. With You by Chris Brown
3. Don’t Stop The Music by Rhianna
4. Apologize by Timbaland featuring One Republic
5. No One by Alicia Keys
6. Love Song by Sara Bareilles
7. Clumsy by Fergie
8. Sensual Seduction by Snoop Dogg
9. New Soul by Yael Naim
10. Take You There by Sean Kingston

To check out the charts every week to see if your favorite song is number one go to www. Billboard.com.

The Golden Compass Book Review

The Golden Compass

Book Review

We've all heard about the book The Golden Compass, whether it was the movie, the news report, or you actually visited a library. The book was written by an atheist and maybe if he had prayed to God he could have written it better.

The characters were good especially Lyra, the main character. A spunky girl who has adventures with her best friend Will. For all those who puke on Disney movies this tale actually has a dark side. An epic battle between God and the Devil occurs and Lyra is actually Eve from the garden. The book is good with a lot of interesting characters but it's completely psycho.

The first book deals with Lyra and her demon(named Pan) and their quest to free their friends. Treachery from bo th of Lyra's parents make up the climax scene. On a side note a pretty good bear fight occurs.

In the second book Lyra meets Will a courageous yet naive boy and things really heat up. With the use of a subtle knife the trio is able to transport between worlds. The second one is proably the most boring but descripitive book of the trilogy.

The third book deals with the fight between the rogue angels led by Lyra's father and the Church(god). A pretty good climax in this one.

I guess you could read this book. Although Pullman has a hundred different writings throughout the story and an amatuer could've wrote better I suggest you read it.

Dream Factory Review

Dream Factory

"Where dreams come true."

S. Hof

I recently read the book Dream Factory, by Brad Barkley and Heather Hepler. The story is set in present-day, in none other than Disney Land as a group of teens is recruited to fill in for the striking characters of the Disney family. Dream Factory takes an unusual approach in story-telling, alternating narrators each chapter. The first narrator is Ella who, naturally, plays Cinderella because, to be frank, 'the shoe fits'. Prince Charming is played by a boy called Mark who is obsessed with all things Disney. The second narrator is a boy named Luke who plays the fur character "Dale" from Chip n' Dale. His girlfriend, Cassie, plays Chip.

Dream Factory is interesting in the fact that it causes readers to look at Disney Land, or any amusement park for that matter, in a whole new way. We sometimes forget that the characters we see are people just like us, and aren't always as cheerful as a role like Mickey Mouse requires. It's also an easy book for kids to relate to, because the characters deal with issues facing many of us today. Granted, we aren't concerned about cleaning out a giant chipmunk's head before the next show, but many of the characters are preparing for college or ready-made futures waiting for them at the end of the summer. There's also plenty of romance, confusion, worries, and self-realization all wrapped up and waiting for eager readers to discover. So far as I'm concerned, Dream Factory is the ideal story for any teen. It touches on so many key issues that we face today that you'd have a hard time not feeling some sort of satisfaction and warmth when you finish.

Shaq Gets Traded to Suns

By: Tyler Sluder

Wednesday afternoon the trade was finalized. Shaquille O’ Neal was traded by the Miami Heat to the Phoenix Suns for Shawn Marion, and Marcus Banks. “Shaq”, as he is referred to by fans, is a 7 foot 1 inch center from Newark, New Jersey. He played college basketball at Louisiana State. The Suns are Shaq's fourth team in his career.

This season with the heat, Shaq is averaging 14 points 7 rebounds and 1 block per game in limited time and is suffering from an injured hip. He has missed fifteen games this season, and at one time he missed eight in a row.

For his career, Shaq averages 25 points per game, along with eleven rebounds and two blocks per game and has averaged 36 minutes per game. Those average however have gone down drastically in the last two seasons, with him averaging about 28 minutes, fifteen points, seven rebounds, and one block per game.

Sunshine—Movie Review

Nikole Picklesimer

I recently watched the movie Sunshine. My first impression was that this movie was dull and boring, but don't judge a book by it's cover...This movie turned out to be really thrilling.

Sunshine is set in the future(50 years from now). The sun is dying and in a last attempt to save Earth, 8 astronauts are sent up in space to set a bomb off on the sun to try an re-ignite the massive star.

Along the way, there are many obstacles that the crew will have to face, including ship problems and an unwanted guest on board.

Sunshine is a great sci-fi meets action flick. The way the the producers combined the two makes the movie irresistable and impossible to turn off. Anyone who loves a great action flick with an awesome twist should see Sunshine.

Actors in this movie include Rose Byrne, Cliff Curtis, Chris Evans, Troy Garity, Cillian Murphy, Hiroyuki Sanada, Mark Strong, Benedict Wong and Michelle Yeoh.

Take Care of Your Health This Winter

So have you been feeling not so well lately? Maybe you feel like your getting one to many headaches? Or that you have been feeling nauseated throughout the day? You may be coming down with the Norwalk Virus. The Norwalk virus is a stomach virus that lasts for one to three days. The symptoms include:

· Stomach cramps
· Headache
· Muscle aches and pains
· A low grade fever
· Nausea and Vomiting
· Diarrhea

It is easily spread in schools, residential homes, hospitals, and work places. Good steps to take from getting this virus are:

· Wash your hands throughout the day
· Get enough sleep so your immune system wont weaken
· Drink green tea
· Eat fruits and vegetables they are packed with immune boosting cartenoids
· Avoid germs, such as hand contact with people who are sick and touching tabletops, counters, etc.

Everyone else may know it as the stomach bug but if not treated properly it could become dangerous. Please take the proper precautions so that we can all remain healthy.

The Complete List of Teachers' Answers

Hey guys. Here's the complete sheet of answers we got from the teachers. Enjoy!
- Chey



What's the difference between a novel and a book?

"About six bucks.”- Mr. Deems

“Well...seriously...A novel is a book-length work of fiction. Just being fictional and bound isn't enough--collections of short stories, novellas, and other fictional texts can be bound, but they don't thus become a novel. A book, by contrast, is a volume of fictional or non-fictional work. Although these are often bound, again, binding isn't essential. For example, books can be electronic with scanned images. The lack of binding doesn't mean that it thus isn't a book. Additionally, a book--in common usage--tends to have a copyright and be the product of a publisher. One could debate this aspect: is an unpublished diary a book? etc. In short, a novel is usually a book, but a book isn't necessarily a novel. The terms aren't interchangeable. Just remember that novel refers only to works of fiction. If the book ain't fiction, it ain't a novel.” – Mrs. Powell

“A novel is something new, "That's a NOVEL idea!" A book is what they throw at you when you get arrested.” – Mr. Parker

“A novel contains a story while a book tells a tale.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Who reads around here? Besides Ms. Morrow?” – Ms. Salyers

“A novel is a great piece of literature that impacts the lives of those who read it. A book is just a piece of writing with little meaning.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If you fart and burp at the same time, would it make a vacuum in your tummy?

"Unless you exploded first, which seems the more likely scenario.”- Mr. Deems

“No.... Burps are just smart farts who took the elevator up instead of down.” – Mrs. Powell

“No, this is similar to sneezing & farting simultaneously...something we've all experienced!” – Ms. Small

“No, judging from the students around here it actually creates a vacuum between your ears, oddly enough.” – Mr. Parker

“I'm only certain that you'd feel better afterward.”- Mrs. Hadaway

“What? Who is your Science teacher?” – Ms. Salyers

“Definitely yes. Mythbusters says so.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If a doctor suddenly died while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?

"Depends upon the advice of the Insurance Company Nazis.”- Mr. Deems

“Why work on the doctor if he is already dead?” – Mrs. Powell

“It depends on who has the better insurance.” – Mr. Parker

“What about the nurses? Are you suggesting they're unimportant? The Nurse's Association will be contacting you about this. Notify your lawyers.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Depends...if the patient is someone like me, you know irreplaceable, then obviously they would work on me. On the other hand, if it were someone like Mr. Parker they would definitely work on the Doctor!” – Ms. Salyers

“The doctor.” – Mrs. Tubbs


When the French swear do they say pardon my English?

"The French are largely unaware that such a thing as "English" even exists.”- Mr. Deems

“No, they say pardon my Spanish!” – Mrs. Powell

“Never!” – Ms. Small

“No, they have different words for EVERYTHING. Merci beaucoup.” – Mr. Parker

“Of course they do. They don't like us just as much as we don't like them.” – Ms. Salyers

“They tend to ignore the ugly American completely.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

"Curiosity has killed more than cats.” – Mr. Deems

“Who says I haven't tried to count the stars? You haven't lived until you have laid on your back in a field and stared up a perfect starry night. And it is fun to stick your finger in wet paint. You leave a mark!” – Mrs. Powell

“Just laziness. I counted and there are actually 4,578,345, 657 stars.And the paint was already dry.” – Mr. Parker

“Because it'd take too long to count the stars. Duh!” – Mrs. Hadaway

“No one really believes there are 4 billion stars either, but who is going to sit and count them to win that argument? On the other hand I can prove that the paint isn't wet and can win that one right away!” – Ms. Salyers

“The humans' incapability to accept the simple the not ponder the sophisticated.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Where do all the daylight savings hours go?

"Some bank financing terrorists. Or Republicans.” – Mr. Deems

“In a sun bank.” – Mrs. Powell

“Jamaica, mahn!” – Mr. Parker

“In the daylight savings bank. Remember? It was part of the plot in Die Hard Two when those crazy criminals tried to rob it. I think they had foreign accents and there was a lot of shooting.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“In the daylight savings bank of course.” – Ms. Salyers

“Beyond the mountains.” – Mrs. Tubbs

Why is it that when people ask you "what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?" no one ever replies, "A BOAT"?

"How dull. I would rather have a rocket ship.” – Mr. Deems

“What good is a boat "on" a desert island? You can't float on land!” – Mrs. Powell

“Or a helicopter. I'd rather have a helicopter than a boat. Boats make me burp and fart at the same time, causing a vacuum to build in my stomach.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Because no one really wants to come back! A deserted island seems like fun to me. Lay out everyday, wake up when you want, never have to get dressed up, never go to work, don't have to deal with the crap from the boys of the world, and you can wear flip-flops everyday of your life.” – Ms. Salyers

“That is the obvious and humans tend to overlook the obvious.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If you're on an American airline, and you land in Canada and stay on the plane, is the drinking age still 21 or does it change to 19?

"Who cares. Get a fake I.D.”- Mr. Deems

“The international drinking age is 18. However, most airlines will use the drinking laws of their home country, regardless of where you are. By this, American Airlines will only serve people of ages 21 and up. This is for legal reasons.” – Mrs. Powell

“Seriously, it changes when you reach the border...” – Ms. Small

“Why would you want to go to CANADA??? It is soo cold there they think Hockey is fun and they all want to come here and be actors or newscasters.” – Mr. Parker

“Since I'm way beyond 21 and 19, I hardly care.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Who cares you shouldn't be drinking anyhow you alcoholic!” – Ms. Salyers

“It changes to 19.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?

"Anyone who feels compelled to ask if they can ask a question SHOULD be shot.”- Mr. Deems

“No....too messy when they bleed.” – Mrs. Powell

“ALWAYS.” – Ms. Small

“No. It just makes such a mess. Which isn't a big problem if your wife cleans it up, but then she gripes at you for three days and THAT is problem.” – Mr. Parker

“No, because they said, "fire AWAY" not "fire AT ME" Ha! These questions are a breeze!” – Mrs. Hadaway

“At once! Just one less idiot to deal with.” – Ms. Salyers

“Yes.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Isn't it weird that if you rearrange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?

”Weird. Indeed.”- Mr. Deems

“Hmmmmmmm... Isn't interesting that you can also get hectare, rechate, recheat, reteach. Can you define any of these words, smart aleck! Oh rearrange student and you stunted!!!” – Mrs. Powell

“Know. How due yuo think moast uf us urned are degrees?” – Mr. Parker

“And I have to RETEACH to the CHEATER. How appropriate.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Is it weird that if you rearrange the word kids you get...well you can figure it out for yourself.” – Ms. Salyers

“Definitely a coincidence.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?

”What a great idea!” – Mr. Deems

“This would be determined by where you live. Different countries have different laws regarding what you can name your child.” – Mrs. Powell

“Isn't their another word that means the same thing?” – Mr. Parker

“No. But whoever did it would also probably spell it incorrectly.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Yes.” – Ms. Salyers

“No. It would scar them for life.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If you died with braces on would they take them off?

”Only if they were made of platinum. Or gold. Or something like that.” – Mr. Deems

“Depends if they are paid for or not!” – Mrs. Powell

“Heck no. You paid for 'em so you keep 'em!” – Ms. Salyers

“I sure hope so. Braces were a very unpleasant time in my life.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Have ex-mathematicians become dysfunctional?

”ALL mathematicians are dysfunctional.” – Mr. Deems

“A mathematician does not have to be an ex-mathematician to be dysfunctional!” – Mrs. Powell

“Obviously! Although, they were pretty dysfunctional from the beginning.” – Ms. Salyers


Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song?

”Gotta love ya some Sesame Street! :)”- Mr. Deems

“The alphabet has often been described as an arbitrary collection of symbols representing an arbitrary collection of sounds. Its order is equally random. The origins of the earliest alphabets, which were probably created around 4,000 years ago, are quite murky. The earliest form of the alphabet was invented by the Semitic peoples living in Egypt. This original alphabet eventually gave rise to written Hebrew, Arabic, Greek, and the modern Roman languages. The alphabet developed much out of laziness. Early pictograms required readers and writers to memorize hundreds of specific images representing words and ideas. The alphabet, on the other hand, was a kind of phonetic shorthand in which thirty basic sounds could be strung together to form words. Egyptian hieroglyphics used both pictograms and phonemes (symbols that represent sounds). The first phonemes were based on pictograms -- for example, the symbol representing house, or "beth" in spoken Semitic, eventually became the letter "B." So, while there isn't an exact reason for the order, I can give you one fun (if rather obvious) fact you may not have realized -- the word "alphabet" comes from "alpha" and "beta," the first two words.” – Mrs. Powell

“Yeah, DUHH!” – Mr. Parker

“The ancient Greeks threw the letters up in the air and that's how they landed.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“No. There is no order. That is just the work of another brilliant teacher creating a technique to get kids to remember the letters. You can definitely sing it another way. j,e,y,s,p,b,g,z,o,w,q...” – Ms. Salyers


Does the little mermaid wear an algebra?

”What a smutty and perverted question. She is a Pristine Disney Chick. How dare you think of her undergarments!” – Mr. Deems

“Yes she wears an algae bra! Ha, Ha!” – Mrs. Powell

“No, but she wears a turtle girdle.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“No way. She is way too cute to have anything to do with algebra. First of all she does not have any algae because she would scrape it off with her dingle hopper, and as far as bras go...who needs 'em when you look like her?” – Ms. Salyers


Can I get arrested for running into a Fire House yelling Movie! Movie!?

”Only if it is a really good movie.” – Mr. Deems

“Yes!”- Mrs. Powell

“NO. They will just fire up the DVD Player, thinking you have a Disc they haven't viewed while they sit around and get paid to wait for fires that never happen.” – Mr. Parker

“Probably not, but if Mr. Schneider was on duty, it'd be interesting.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“I'm not sure, but I would love to try it out for you. I loooooooove fire fighters.” – Ms. Salyers

“Possibly. Depends on the mood of the firefighters.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If a Man is talking in the forest and there is no woman there to hear him, is he still wrong?

”Of course.”- Mr. Deems

“Of course!” – Mrs. Powell

“Of course.” – Ms. Small

“We are NEVER wrong. We just give in to get peace and quiet.” – Mr. Parker

“Why would a man be talking in the forest to himself? Did he go there to burp and fart simultaneously?” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Of course he is. It isn't much different outside of the forest, because no one is listening to him then either.” – Ms. Salyers

“Yes.” – Mrs. Tubbs


What came first? The chicken or the egg?

”God.” – Mr. Deems

“Now a team made up of a geneticist, philosopher and chicken farmer claim to have found an answer. It was the egg. Put simply, the reason is down to the fact that genetic material does not change during an animal's life. Therefore the first bird that evolved into what we would call a chicken, probably in prehistoric times, must have first existed as an embryo inside an egg. Professor John Brookfield, a specialist in evolutionary genetics at the University of Nottingham, told the UK Press Association the pecking order was clear. The living organism inside the eggshell would have had the same DNA as the chicken it would develop into, he said. "Therefore, the first living thing which we could say unequivocally was a member of the species would be this first egg," he added. "So, I would conclude that the egg came first." – Mrs. Powell

“First you must define "Chickeness", then you have to decide if you are theorizing from a Scientific, Evolutionary viewpoint or some Creationist thing. But it really comes down to what is "Chickeness?" I took a philosophy class in college and we spent a whole quarter arguing just that one issue. Oddly, we all got goose eggs for grades.” – Mr. Parker

“The prokaryotic bacteria came first. But just to check, I looked it up on the internet and it said, I swear, "If a kangaroo laid an egg from which an ostrich hatched, that would surely be an ostrich egg, not a kangaroo egg." I think that settles it once and for all!” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Obviously the chicken, because Noah didn't take eggs on the Ark he only took the animals.” – Ms. Salyers

“The chicken.” – Mrs. Tubbs


If a rooster laid an egg on the pointed roof and the wind blew it in which way would the egg roll?

”What kind of transvestite roosters are we talking about here?” – Mr. Deems

“Roosters can't lay eggs.” – Mrs. Powell

“Down.” – Ms. Small

“Egg Roll? They come from Roosters?? How come you can only get them in Chinese restaurants? . . .Hmm, I bet it is only special Chinese Roosters” – Mr. Parker

“I don't like egg rolls. Just thinking about them makes me slightly nauseated.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Rooster's don't lay eggs, duh, hens do.” – Ms. Salyers

“Roosters can't lay eggs.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Why doesn't the glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

”Who knows. Ask Mrs. Greene. She is a science geek.” – Mr. Deems

“As long as the glue remains inside the bottle away from air it will remain fluid. Glue hardens when there is a loss of water from the formula. Exposure to the atmosphere will cause the water to evaporate and make the glue harden.” – Mrs. Powell

“It DOES. Glue just doesn't stick to itself, so most of it pours out. I think it has something to do with magnetism and like things (glue) repelling each other.” – Mr. Parker

“Because the Harry Potter club put an anti-sticking charm on it.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Duh, everyone knows this.” – Ms. Salyers

“A special formula concocted by Larry Parker in his secret lab under Shea Stadium.” – Mrs. Tubbs


Can you slam a revolving door?

”Good luck with that.” – Mr. Deems

“No but you can slam into it.” – Mrs. Powell

“You COULD slam INTO it.” – Ms. Small

“I stuck a 2x4 into one once, and watched my grandmother SLAM into the glass when it stopped suddenly. My Grandfather fell out of his wheel chair he laughed so hard.” – Mr. Parker

“No but if you cram too many people into one wedge, it gets REALLY uncomfortable because no one can move their legs, and you are sort of scraped along. Not that I have ever done that.” – Mrs. Hadaway

“Of course, just watch out so it doesn't come back and hit you.” – Ms. Salyers

“Yes put the door guard will yell at you. He did it to us at the Omni Netherland our senior prom.” – Mrs. Tubbs